30 Minute Fanfic
by MrLegitimacy
Summary: Inspired by LittleKuriboh's Fanfic Friday videos, I'm dealt two random characters, a random location, and a random scenario with which I must compose a story within 30 minutes time. If you have suggestions for characters, locations, or scenarios, leave them in the comments!
1. Goten & Amethyst in Tokyo

Characters: Goten (Dragon Ball Z) and Amethyst (Steven Universe)  
Scenario: Goten and Amethyst are reincarnated lovers, but aren't initially compatable with each other.  
Location: Tokyo

"Whoaaah, look at all these people in costumes!" Goten exclaimed, grabbing Amethyst's hand and gesturing towards the group of cosplayers gathered in the square. "This guy even looks like me!"

"I'm supposed to be Son Goku," the unfortunately overweight manbaby protested, though his whining fell on deaf ears currently being picked with a pinky finger.

"I don't get the point of dressing up," said Amethyst as she inspected what was stuck to her digit, "when you can do THIS." The crowd erupted into gasps interspersed with squeals of joy as she assumed the form of international pop star Gem . Over the din of the crowd, Goten managed to signal for her to follow him away from all the chaos perpetuating from the pack of weebs. She quickly returned to her regular appearance, save for the girlish sundress she had donned for the occasion.

"Sorry, I thought you might get a laugh out of some of the weirdos walking around in broad daylight," he said with a dejected looked on his face. "Blind dates always throw me for a loop, y'know?"

His old friend Steven had set them up together. "It'll be great," Steven had assured him. "You two will be perfect for each other!" Goten was now having his doubts of that, as Steven's monologue continued to play in the thought bubble floating alongside him. "You're both really good at fighting, and you both like food and-"

That was it. Food! He questioned Steven's suggestion of sparring on what was supposed to be a date, because most everyone he had ever sparred with outside of the Z Fighters ended up being hospitalized. However, their were ample opportunities for a couple on their first date to find some grub in the busy city of Tokyo. "Why don't we get something to eat?" he said, waving the thought bubble out of existence.

"Now you're talkin' my language, buddy boy!" said Amethyst, eyes widening at the prospect. Of course she never really needed to eat, but after getting dolled up by Pearl and Steven just to spend time with a human she didn't already know, nothing sounded better than chowing down. "I just hope you can keep up," she teased, bumping him heavily with her shoulder. She was surprised that he wasn't thrown several feet by this, in fact he didn't budge at all.

"I think I'll do just fine, I take after my dad after all!" he remarked as he proudly patted his belly. "I know this great spot for ramen real close to here, wanna check it out?"

"Sure, why not?" Amethyst had never eaten ramen before, or really much of anything outside of Beach City's offerings. Fries and donuts were certainly sufficient, but it was time to broaden her horizons. Perhaps in even more ways than one, as this spiky haired kid was starting to grow on her.

"Irashaimase!" cried the shop owner as our couple brushed the hanging cloth squares out of their faces. The hole-in-the-wall restaurant was empty other than a man slumped over into his empty bowl and what appeared to be entirely too many workers for such a small kitchen.

"This place is kind of a dump," remarked Amethyst.

"Shh, that's rude!" Goten retorted. "And it may not look like much, but you won't find better noodles anywhere else not hidden in the leaves." Whatever that meant. "Start us off with two of the usual, pops!" The cook succinctly bowed, and backed away as if being pulled while standing on a skateboard.

"Well, I guess there's nothing wrong with dumps," Amethyst confessed, thinking fondly of her room in the temple. "So who's the toughest guy you've ever fought?"

Goten leapt at the opportunity to discuss battle, since at home all his dad ever did was push him to study textbook on textbook of things that were decidedly NOT fighting. "Well there was this one pink guy; he punched his way into the pocket dimension I was training in with Trunks and Mr. Piccolo. He was so strong, me and Trunks had to fuse just to take him on!"

"Wait, YOU can fuse?" She was dumbfounded. Of course she knew one other normal human capable of fusion, but she figured it was more of a Rose Quartz thing.

"Sure, anyone can if you do the dance in sync with each other." About this time they had their bowls of ramen slammed in front of them, liquid sloshing but impressively not spilling a single drop. The cook crossed his arm with a smug look on his face, once again sliding into the background.

Without saying a word, the two looked at each other, then to their ramen, then back to each other. After an eye-catching sequence of breaking apart chopsticks from the cup on the table, the two tore into their meal. Within 5 minutes the pair had inhaled enough ramen to put Kirby to shame, and leave a stack of dishes taller than either of them.

After the two let out a precious simultaneous belch, Amethyst reached for a toothpick and reclined with an arm behind her head as she went to work on her Pearly whites (Amethyst-y whites?). "Ready for round two?"

"I'm just getting warmed up! Yo pops, keep 'em coming!" This time it was less sharing-a-meal and more ramen-eating-world-cup. Each bowl was downed with increasing ferocity, until they were forehead to forehead and still shoveling noodles in their face holes. Even for a master cook like the shopkeep, it was hard to keep up the pace. Hoping they wouldn't notice he was slipping, he sat down only a single bowl in front of them. Both reached for the bowl, and both grabbed it, pulling it between them. A synchronized flash of chopsticks ended in the messiest Lady and the Tramp recreation ever imagined, and as their mouths met a bright light shone from their bodies.

When the light had faded, only a single figure sat at the noodle bar, and a voice from the kitchen exclaimed, "Get a room!"


	2. Grim & Batman in Townsville

div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;"I'm uploading these in chronological order, so here I present the second one I ever wrote close to a year ago. It was very informed by the recency of the Batman vs Superman movie, as you will probably notice./span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;"Characters:Grim (Billy Mandy) and Batman (Batman)br /Scenario: /spanspan style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;"Grim comforting a sad Batman/span/div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;"Location: The City of Townsville/span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;"THE CITY, OF TOWNSVILLE/span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;"Is being attacked by a giant three headed dog!/span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" "Oh no!" cried the mayor of Townsville. "Ms. Bellum, call the girls!" br / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" "I'm afraid they're on vacation with the Professor," came a cool voice from the hourglass whose head remained out of / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" "Bohhh, I knew I shouldn't have approved that time off. Isn't there anyone else who can help us?"br / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" "Well, sir, it appears someone is already on it." The beautiful Bellum slowly raised a finger to point to the Bat shape hanging in the clouds over the rooftops of / br / The citizens fled through the streets in a frenzy. The giant Cerberus and its canine underlings were ravaging the town, causing any and all mayhem possible. A shadow appeared on the back of the demonic beast's center head, a whistly dropping sound accompanying the shrinking of it. The hound turned its heads, only to receive three faces full of JUSTICE. As if on cue, a winged craft descended on the pack of mind controlled canines and swiftly doused them with sleeping / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" Amidst the chaos, a poor girl with a lollipop was caught in the gas and fell down a convenient chasm left by the destruction. The Dark Knight touched down on the streets unaware of this / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" "I'm not the hero your town deserves, but I'm the one it needs," announced Batman to quell the shock-ridden citizens. Out of the corner of his eye Batman caught a puff of smoke, instinctively launching a batarang towards it with expert precision. br / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" The batarang clanged away and out of the cloud, and from within could be heard, "What's de deal, Mon?" From the dissipating smoke stepped the Grim Reaper, clearly irritated. "I'm just tryin to do me job. I get enough of this bologna at home!"br / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" "Nobody has died here, Reaper," Batman said as he landed directly in front of the ghastly / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" "The Reaper knows when he needs to collect, and I'm here for the little girl dat fell down DIS hole," he said with a justifying point towards the / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" Batman slowly looked over the edge. "Sweet Salmonella, Batman!" Robin's head popped up, nearly colliding with his mentor's. "She's dead!"br / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" "No..."br / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" "I'm afraid so, and if you'll excuse me I've got to take care of me business."br / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" "No, I can't kill people.. I can't let people die!"br / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" "I know it's difficult at first, Mon, but eventually you get used to it," offered Grim, leaning on his scythe. "The worst ting is wanting to send someone to de Underworld so bad, but not being able to touch them. And all over de soul of a hamster..."br / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" Batman fell to the ground, devastated. Reeling from the thoughts running through his brain, of parents and children, innocent people... And death. Then something clicked. "I'm free."br / /span/div  
div dir="ltr" /div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" "What was dat?"br / /span/div  
div dir="ltr"span style="font-family: 'arial' , 'helvetica' , sans-serif;" "I'll have a new client for you soon." The Batmobile promptly stopped above, and with a grappling hook the caped hero ascended to the cockpit. His next mission, taking out the alien that could rule the planet if he so desired./span/div 


	3. Rey & Obi Wan Make America Great Again

It was in the cards that I should have two Star Wars characters simultaneously, and I think it turned out as my funniest one yet! Hope you dig the references to the "orange occupant."

Characters:

Obi Wan (Episode II & III)  
Rey (The Force Awakens)

Location: The Oval Office

Scenario: Rey trains Obi-Wan in combat.

It baffled Obi-Wan to no end. How how such a man taken posession of this office? Why were they here, of all places? And why, was Rey trying to train /him/ in the Jedi arts? "So, what exactly qualifies you to train me?" He said, throwing his arms aside in a display of disbelief.

"Don't drop your guard!" Rey deftly reached her staff behind Kenobi's feet, and swept them from beneath him. A great /Oogh/ escaped the Jedi master's throat as his rear heavily contacted the massive eagle woven into the center of the prestigious room's rug. His bewilderment had distracted him, clouding his connection with the Force such that he couldn't even forsee a simple manuever the likes of which he should have dodged with his eyes closed.

"Can you tell me, Rey," he pulled himself from the ground as he began, "Why this was your chosen location?" They stood in the center of the Oval Office, a mere comedy act before the orange occupant. The fact that anyone had elected such an obvious tyrant after everything that had transpired with Palpatine in the Galactic Senate, and that they now stood in a scene eerily reminiscent of Anakin and Mace Windu's confrontation with the Supreme Chancellor occupied a good portion of his mental capacity. "How did you even gain access to this building?"

"He told me he would send my family back to Jakku," Rey said, with a nod to the commander in chief.

"It's true," he chimed in. "If they're hiding illegaly in our borders, we'll find them and send them right back where they came from." As if the similarities to the eventual Emperor were not numerous enough already.

"And what have you promised him in return? With the price of spaceflight off of this planet, I can't imagine this would be an act of charity."

"We just have to entertain him for a day, that's why I brought you along," she answered, still bouncing in a combat stance and flashing a smile.

From behind the desk could be heard, "You'll need to step your game up, I'm already getting bored!" The last word stretched out longer than was appropriate for a man of his age and distinction.

Obi-Wan looked astounded. With a dejected tone he asked, "How could you have agreed to something like this? We are keepers of the peace, not court jesters!" Of course Rey knew nothing of the old Jedi Order, but surely she had more self respect than this. "My allegiance is to the Republic, to democracy!"

"I see now," Rey displayed a look of sad realization. Her gaze turned from the floor to Obi-Wan, from Obi-Wan back to the floor, then from the floor to the President. "He's no respect for anyone." She readied her staff, turning towards the desk. "We should apprehend him! He's got to be worth at least 6 portions."

"Rey, please. The Jedi are not self-seeking! This is our duty." He ignited his lightsaber, and with a glance over his shoulder said, "Besides, we have a few others to deal with first." From the doorway stepped two Magna Guard droids, poised to neutralize the situation. Master Kenobi donned his signature stance, a finger pointed to each of the enemy combatants.

"I'll take the left one, you take the right," Rey offered, strafing her chosen opponent and waiting for an opening.

"Or, we can try this." Obi-Wan swept his hands towards the droids, then quickly backward. Reaching out in the Force, he pulled them as if by lasso and threw them out the window. "It's over, Mr. President. Surrender yourself peacefully and there will be no trouble."

"No.. No, No, No, NO!" Rising from his desk, he immediately shot lighting from his fingertips, and a monumentous battle ensued.

So yeah, it got cut a bit short, but I think we can all imagine that it was 4 grate justice.


End file.
